Monday, March 14, 2011

Contemplating

I'm feeling like a slacker.

Funny words from a person who rarely has time to eat and sleep, but it's true.  

I've had so little homework to do during clerkship, and I've taken advantage of that fact.  Around me, friends are studying for the final, writing their pharmacology exam, prepping for their in-class peer review (I did mine first, so nothing to prep since January) and just generally being more proactive than I am.  I'm the girl who makes everyone feel better about themselves when they THINK they've been slacking and then find out I've done even less.

The truth is, I've always been this way.  I'm a procrastinator, through and through.  Give me extra time for a task and I will fill it with something entirely unrelated.  Last minute is my style... mix in a little perfectionist for a fairly uncomfortable combo.  That's just who I am. 

Lately I find myself filling my extra time with daydreaming.  This is new for me.  I've never been much of a dreamer.  In my mind, I am imagining life after the MEP.  I am arranging furniture in our new apartment, exploring our new-old city, reconnecting with friends, catching up with my Ontario friends on facebook... I think it's funny that I'm spending so much time daydreaming and fantasizing about doing normal every day things.  I'm so ready to fall in love with Winnipeg again... maybe for the first time. 

Today one of the midwives told me she is really excited about my future endeavours, and she said the most lovely thing: "I'm excited for you, and you are totally ready for this."  Tonight I'm savouring that comment.  And not doing any work.

3 comments:

Teegan said...

yah, I should be packing and studying, but instead I am bumbling around the internet, slacking off. All the best to you as you plow through these next few days, and prepare to head back to MB.

Melissa N said...

Just wanted to say I have really appreciated finding your blog, as a first year in the MEP! I'd love to see a recent post from after the end of placements! Best wishes!

Smartypants said...

Thanks Melissa! I've had trouble figuring out how to describe life since the end of placement... I think I'm ready now!